"i can see your bra" good. its cute and i paid $50 for it.
woah! are bras really that expensive??
Just in case you weren’t on the moon last night. This is what earth looked like from the moon’s perspective
Good thing I can experience the lunar eclipse from the comfort of my own bed on the interweb.
"Hey, how do you spell Massachusetts?"
"How should I know? Just grab a handful of Scrabble tiles and let fate decide."
"How many stars are on the US flag?"
"Uhh.. I dunno.. 11?"
i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
people who are in their 20 or 30s complaining about ‘kids these days’ is super funny to me, like i saw someone complaining about how kids at some pool were playing marco polo but with ‘hashtag’ ‘yolo’ and if that’s not funny to you then what the hell sucked the joy out of your life
These are fucking beautiful